


It's still a mystery to me

by EmmaDurin



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Other, aidean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-14
Updated: 2013-06-14
Packaged: 2017-12-14 23:36:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/842737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmmaDurin/pseuds/EmmaDurin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aidan made a terrible mistake when he Left Dean, and now he wants to go back, and only asks for a second chance.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's still a mystery to me

I think everyone can hear my heart beat. Fast and nervous. I climb the stairs, trying to be quiet, but it’s almost impossible, the stairs are old and still made of wood, they almost break when i step my foot on them, and the loud noise that comes can wake up the whole building.  
Still, i try to be quiet, walking on my tip toes. My breathing is becoming faster, just like me heart beat.  
I take a deep breath and i close my eyes, imagining what is about to happen. The thoughts of Dean’s surprised and confused face make me sweat. Great, now i’m a nervous bastard with sweaty hands!  
Then i wake up from my day dream and come back to reality, and this just hits me: he won’t forgive me.  
I can feel the tears forming in my eyes, and i want to stop. I don’t want to cry. The last time i cried was yesterday, and it was painful, and all because of this.

\--

I was watching TV on a normal Sunday morning and i started to think about the past. Our past.  
If i wouldn’t have left Dean, we could be right there on the couch, maybe not watching TV, of course, but probably cuddling.  
I still picture his face, and the way he used to taste. My mornings never been the same without those beautiful eyes, staring at me, filled with tears of happiness.  
I took that happiness away from him. And now i miss him so much... It hurts to know it was my entire fault, and it was a stupid thing that made me do it.  
I was embarrassed and scared of what people would think about us, if they would joke or not, if i would lose my friends or not, of if my family would agree. That all came to my mind, and i forgot the most important person in the middle of all this: Dean.  
People say that the one who joke with you are not your friends, right? I know all that, but i was already so used to the fake comfort those people gave me, that i didn’t want to lose it all.  
Life seemed so easy like that, why complicate it because of a man?  
I soon realized he is not just a man. He is THE man! The man i would love to spend the rest of my life with. Life could be difficult sometimes if i was with him, but does that really matters?  
Everyone could joke with me or be disgusted, but i know that in the end of the day, my Dean would be there for me, holding me, telling me everything will be alright.  
And i would forget all the rest, and all my fears would be gone.  
But i made a mistake. I decided to live without him, to pretend he didn’t exist, and it seemed the right thing to do, but the days passed, and my feelings for him grew.  
I spent days looking at our pictures together and wishing to go back in time and bring all those moments back. I love him so much.

 

And now here i am again, crying at his door, waiting for him to come out and tell me he still loves me.  
And i wait. And i still hope. And nobody opens the door, so i knock again, but still there is no answer. Where is he? He usually opens the door in a second; he doesn’t like to let people wait.  
I think about all the possible things that could have happened to him, and i even think of the possibility of him being dead... Please someone tell me he is still alive...  
I just turn around and i sit on the floor, with my back against the wall. I don’t want to think, or to cry, or to have any emotions, i just want to die in this moment.

 

I close my eyes to hold the tears... and my heart stops when i hear a soft voice whispering to me “Aidan...?”  
I suddenly open my eyes “Oh my God...” I don’t even think, i just hug him, feeling him to make sure he is really there.  
“What happened? Why are you here?” he said, resting his hands on my shoulders. He looks so worried about me, i feel bad for making him feel like that.  
I take a deep breath, and i try to speak, to say anything at all, but all i can say is “I love you, Dean”. I think that speaks for a million words.  
He looks down at the floor, closing his eyes and biting his lower lip, and seeing him like that makes my heart beat even faster.  
“Please, tell me you still love me, Dean. Please... i’m so sorry, I love you. I always did...”  
I’m so desperate; i feel like i can die at any moment if he says he doesn’t love me anymore. He then looks at me with tears in his eyes... but he smiles and says “I know... I saw it in your eyes the day you left me. You didn’t mean what you said. Your eyes showed love, they still do.”  
What I’m feeling is something i can’t even describe. I don’t know what to say, so i just smile like an idiot “Dean, you give me a second chance?”  
“I waited all this time just to give you a second chance, Aidan.”

 

He gets up and lifts me to; just to give me a small kiss on the lips, which seems to take forever to me. But i want more, so i grab his head and i give him a long and tender kiss, just to kill the longing we felt.  
We just smile at each other, and i feel like i could spend the rest of my life living this moment. But i have to ask him “Why weren’t you at home? I came here just to tell you how i feel...”  
He laughs softly, showing those lovely dimples and his cute cheeks turn red.  
“You know, i went to your flat... but you weren’t there, so i just went back home...”  
I smile and i realize how important we are to each other, and i can feel the warm and nice feeling in my heart now, and i hug him again, never letting him go. Because this time it’s forever.


End file.
